Texting: The Rules You Should Never Break
10 Items Every Woman must own Part 02
I left you guys with some suspense last time, but hey...here I am
LBD or Little black dress is a must have. Every woman knows that having a LBD in your closet is very important. In particular invest in the Special one, the one that fits you perfectly. Look for a dress with a detail, an interesting sleeve, an embellished belt that makes it unique.
Black Opaque Tights
A great pair of tights, can make your legs look slimmer and help you to get away wearing a dress that it's a little too short. Double them up for a more opaque look and to keep you warm in winter!
A watch is as much an accessory as it is a timepiece. A gold watch, for example, is a great way to uplift your outfit, if you leave it loose it looks like a bracelet.
Think of this piece like a unique investment, you won't regret it. It will last forever. You'll wear it forever, even if you fluctuate in size, the perfect 'A' shape will make your figure look always amazing.
Look for a 'A' line silhouette that will cinch you in at the waist, wear it on top of a pair of jeans or a pair of smart trousers, trust me you will look always on point and fancy.
This is a flattering body shape for all body types. Pair them with platforms or wedges to get extra height while keeping the look cool and comfortable.
I always suggest to my customers to do a wardrobe check-up, I would say like... every 2 months, keep what you need and makes your body look on point, get rid of those clothes that, even if you are emotionally attached does NOT make you look fab.
10 Items Every Woman Must Own Part 1
It's check your closet with me time...
Either if you are a super-model, an Instagram influencer, a housewife...it doesn't matter...
Hold yourself and be ready for part Uno.
A tailored blazer is classic, femminine and looks great to any body shape and type. Pair it with jeans, little dress, trousers and skirts. Make sure you find the one that fits you well and accentuate your waist -you don't want to look like the blazer it's swallowing you.
Even if you're wearing a basic t-shirt and jeans , use accessories like a printed scarf as the 'bright' piece of your outfit to complete your look.
Black it's the obvious choice, but red flats provides a pop of colour and works for every season. Pair them with a striped shirt or a trench coat.
The striped shirt is a timeless classic and it's back. It looks great paired with brights and prints or peeking out out from underneath the blazer....very chic!
I believe in having few accessories in your closet. A statement necklace can make your outfit look strong and femminine.
First Date What Now?
So you finally managed to convince that cute coffee shop barrista to go out on a date, finally your hiding behind the curtain like a creepy stalker has paid off, and the main question is what am I going to wear?
Don't wear a suit.
You get a pass if you work at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce and three-piece suits are required office attire, but keep in mind that dressing to impress can sometimes backfire. If you're taking her or him to the opera and then a Michelin-starred restaurant on your first date, fine, wear a suit. But don't bring him or her to a dive bar in a tuxedo. If you can't find time to change out of your work duds, at least lose the jacket and loosen your tie a little. On the flip side, don't show up in board shorts and flip-flops. Even if that's how you normally dress, show her you made some effort to look presentable for her and at least cover up your hairy toes.
Cellphone face down
Look, we understand. 'Men' don't carry purses, and having to sit down with a hockey puck-sized phone in your pocket is uncomfortable. If it's possible, keep the offending piece of technology out of sight altogether, but if you need to plop it on the table, silence it and put it face-down. Even if you're fascinated by your date, a light blinking out of the corner of your eye alerting you to an incoming message is distracting, and we notice when your eyes are bobbling back and forth between your phone and our faces (or any other part of us). Another important piece of cell phone etiquette to keep in mind: If you have to take a call, apologize before you do. Don't hold your finger up to silence your date; she's or he's not a dog. Good manners always, besides on how the date goes.
Don't order a salad
Taking care of yourself and being healthy are great, but loosen the dietary strings just a little for this occasion. You don't need to eat a bloody steak from a cow you strangled with your bare hands to prove you're a man's man, but turning your nose up at everything remotely unhealthy and then getting a garden salad makes you seem like a square. On the other hand, resist the urge to order a heaping platter of barbecued giant dinosaur ribs that you need to eat with your hands and feet. This kind of discretion applies to your drink order as well. Don't order sake bombs or start slamming vodka Redbulls. You can't go wrong with beer, any unflavored liquor straight-up or on the rocks, or red wine (if you're having dinner). Which brings us to how many drinks? THREE, no matter how many beer cans you can swallow during the weekend, but on your first date keep it that way unless your date is drunk already.
Ex's No Thanks
They say you should never talk about politics, religion, and past flames on a first date. But if you adhere to only one of those, make it the last. Remember, your date is trying to feel you out just as much as you're trying to feel him or her out. Imagine how you'd feel if your date started to regale you with stories about her or his Nobel laureate ex-boyfriend/girlfriend with the Super Bowl ring. Also imagine how you'd feel if you both started ranting about your loser, cheating, unemployed ex who mooched off for three years. There's just no winning here.
Don't get too glue-ish
Everything's going swimmingly, you're both feeling a nice buzz, you're getting closer, and the chemistry is fantastic. Don't ruin it by slithering your creep hands all over your date body. Even if it's clear that you're really feeling each other, subtlety is key. You don't want to dive in and start grabbing at...the crotch and chest like a horny 15-year-old. Limit contact to arms, shoulders, back, and, if you're really feeling the vibes, the five inches or so on the top of the thigh, right above the knee. If your date is into it, she'll or he'll sidle closer.
Just be yourself and have fun make sure that the both of you are comfortable.
Valetine's day things to do
Valentine's day can put a lot of pressure on couples to find the perfect kind of gift. Getting a fancy new present is always nice, but this year, let's do something clever and take the inexpensive way out, and not only for your budget.
Rather than spending those Pounds to find something your partner will make use of, spend those hours planning out the perfect date.
Don't get caught up in peer pressure or commercialism associated with this day. Instead think of it as a time to honour your love partner, and to let his person know you value, respect, and admire him or her. I am about to give you the "T" the tips just 6 simple ones.
Send them a love note
YES for something meaningful, a message a memory or an inside joke that only the both of you can laugh at.
No for a cheesy song lyrics or poem like...Roses are red, violets are...Like no thanks.
Have quiet time
Yes for some time one-on-one. Lend your partner an ear and talk about goals, wishes and feelings.
No don't bring your cellphone to the table, nothing will happen if you leave it for few moments
Prepare breakfast in bed
Yes for scrambled eggs, toasted bread, maybe some granola to keep it light and focus on the presentation, a nice flower or just some fruit nicely placed.
No don't forget to do something for you as well it's creepy staring at someone either eating or not.
Have a Lot of Sex
Yes for everything that the both of you enjoy doing, make sure to keep it hot and mutual.
No don't limit yourself to the bedroom, of course be safe.
Go down... Memory Lane
Yes for spending some time or the evening going through vacation photos, maybe your wedding photos, or even the funny ones buried of the camera folder of your phone.
No make sure to keep it classy.
Strip poker or another game with emphasis on stripping
Yes have fun. Even if you don't know how to play poker like a pro, just go with the flow or suggest another game you both enjoy.
No don't get too competitive, remember, you'll both be winners at the end.
Brief or Boxers?
Certainly, buying male underwears is the simplest thing to buy, but how many times you have asked yourself: Brief or boxers? Well today I will give you some tips, 8 to be specific, 8 simple tips to chose the right most comfortable underwear for you.
Most men love to wear briefs for a number of reasons. They are standard, go-go underwear available in a range of design, colours, and rises. Briefs are comfortable to wear under just about anything as it completely covers your package and back while leaving your side of the leg and the upper thigh exposed. If you want to keep everything in place and need support, then briefs are an ideal option.
When it comes to the low-rise briefs, they sit on the hips, right below the natural waistline, while providing enough fabric to cover you up. Some low-rise brief designs will enhance the package.
When it comes to this particular design, they sit on the natural waistline. They are perfect to wear with dress pants, regular cut jeans, and board shorts.
When it comes to the high-rise briefs, they will provide a more traditional fit and sit perfectly below the belly button. You can wear them with high-rise pants. It will streamline your waist, smooth out your stomach and reduce the appearance of love handles.
When it comes to the boxer briefs, they wil cover you beautifully about half of your thighs, some of them they cover like a third. They are perfect to wear during sports and workout and provides you protection form chaffing. Like standard briefs, they will give you great support and complete coverage. You can wear them everyday use or for the workouts.
When it comes to boxers, they are loose-fitted undewear with little or no support. However, they allow more breathability when compared to any undergarments. A lot of boxers have a open fly, enabling the wearer an exit route with the utmost of ease.
Nowadays, trunks are becoming a popular trend when it comes to men undewears. It is basically a hybrid of a boxer and brief without the mounds of fabric. You can also say that these are boxer briefs with a square appearance and short legs. You can consider trunks if you like briefs with something different. Trunks are perfect for everyday use, wheter you're going out, dressed up for a business meeting or playing moderate sports. You can pair them with just about...anything.
When it comes to the jockstraps, they offer complete package support and protection . They will actually lift the package upside and keep it away from the rest of the body, which results in a drier and cooler experience than standard briefs. You can pair them up with uniforms, high-intensity sports, bike shorts and tight pants.
If you want a maximum leg confort, then go for the J. Crew jockstraps, as they give a more relaxed fit. You can wear them with pajamas, loose pants and shorts.
Hopefully I was somehow helpful and made clear that even our under clothes are as much important as the outfit is
"'Cause we worth it"
Last night I was watching some runway looks and one of the trend for this SS18 are flowers! I know that some of you are not a big fsn of floral or flower prints, but here I come to help you. Flowers are a timeless trend, they are available during all four season and in all sorts of colours, the important thing gurl that you need to know is, how to to wear them.
Whether you are a beginner or you are a fashionista, I will explain how to flaunt those florals with ease and power, with a little extra. I will make you look and feel gorgez.
You can start with small and simple, perhaps a printed skirt or some florals embroidered on a section of your jeans.
If you are feeling more daring, go for the total look: flowers from head to toe at least, and for sure you are guaranteed to turn heads your way.
Try some accessories, and who said that flowers are only for tapestries and painting?! Nope! When it comes to accessorising your look, try some floral inspired jewellery or a pair of shoes with floral prints. For a bohemian and romantic look, a dress that features floral lace will definitely impress a date.
I didn't convince you?
Well try this...wear a pair of floral underwear, It will make you feel in beautifu-land, and it will make your honey-boo-bo rerally happy!
How to find the right shorts for you
Shorts are a summer essential, I know it's pretty early to talk about summer, considering that I still wear two pair of socks when I am at home. Shorts are very trendy for summer but finding the right pair to flatter your figure and work with your body type isn't always easy. Let's be honest:Sometimes shorts can be the worst. No shade!
Hold your horses, don't worry I am here to help with a quick down-and-dirty guide fo finding the best shorts for your body shape and why not, to hide the parts you want to hide eand to show off your best assest...someone out there has nice knees and calves!
Shorts with a mid-lengthleg are universally flattering. In the businesss we call them walk shorts, day shorts, golf shorts, classic shorts,etc. And are best recognixed by an inseam of about 7 or 8 inches. Unlike knee-lengths shorts that cut your leg in half visually, shorter lengths make your legs look longer, while still covering problemareaslike upper thigh. For the most flattering look, keep fullness under control (slimmer-legged shorts will make your legs look slimmer too).
For flabby upper legs the knee-length shorts are the best option.
If you are feeling self-conscious about your thighs or even your derriere, a great pair of slimming leg-lengthening bermuda shorts are a great option.You can easily cover problem areas (or just create a very polished, professional look) little advice... Not your daughter's jeans bermuda shorts please for the love of Barbra Streisand, that hit at the knee and are slightly high-waisted. Although knee-length shorts can make short legs look shorter, it's easy to balance it out with a pair of wedges for extra leg length. Also, look for slim-cut shorts --these jeans-style shorts are perfect-- to give your legs a longer, slimmer look.
Best option for short legs? Well...Shorter shorts, if you want to give your shorter legs a little more length try rocking a pair of - you guessed it- shorter shorts. A 5 inches inseam or so is a great place to start, if you are a wild "persona", and want to go higher? hun...just make sure they is always something nice to see or show hum...Too much. Four or five inch-inseam shorts are long enough to give some upper-leg coverage, but short enough to lengthen the leg. A void cuffs or rolled-up style because that will just make your legs look shorter.
Plus size figures or you have got lots of curves, a longer-cut short is the most forgiving, like Jessica Simpson in plus sized, ain't pretty honey.
Curvy gals aren't the only ones who look great in a longer short. These almost knee-length shorts are dressier look and are perfect for shopping , travel, even career if your workplace allows them. Pop on a pair of wedges for a leg-lengthening look that's really flattering.
For my tallest and thin friends out there? Roll-up shorts!
You are lucky gurl, you're naturally tall and thin but want to break up a long, thin line. Go with shorts that have cuffs or a roll-up feature.
6 Important Men's Fashion Rules
If you are a man looking for no-fail tips to perfect your style, well there is no need to look further.
Male fashion can be tricky, at times boring, in my opinion, but here it comes....6 simple rules, or tips if you prefer, to ensure you get the right style every time.
Match your belt to your shoes
This is a good rule to follow and it keeps things simple. It's best to stay with traditional colours like black, dark brown or a rich tan. Other colours will be difficult to match, and generally speaking, should be avoided. If you wear sneakers every day that probably means you are wearing jeans, in wich case I suggest trying a belt made of fabric or something equally as casualbut avoid dress belt with jeans and sneakers.
Matching Ties and Shirts
For a while, the solid-colored shirt with a tie of the same (or slightly-off) colour was seen everywhere. This is now a somewhat dated look. Try mixing things upa little and experiment with colours.Ties are great ways to express yourself, but keeping it tasteful is your best bet. You can't go wrong with modern polka-dots, diagonal stripes, plaids and subtle patterns. As for clip on ties....well most of the times is NO!
Pleats vs. Flat-Front
Why so many men have avoided flat-front trousers has always been a mistery to me. Flat-front trousers look better than pleated pants, at least most of the time, plus pleats make you look less slim. I have heard guys wear pleats because it's more comfortable or because are more for athletic bodies. Personal opinion? Well it's all about my opinons in here,
silly me...We are in 2018 not in 1985..wake up, Flat-front trousers are more fashionable.
The more official rule about socks is that should match with the colour of your trousers, though not exactly the same shade unless, of course, you are wearing black in which case it's okay.However I personally prefer to wear socks with patterns, such as stripes in various colours. Massive note....white socks are reserved for the gym NO excuse.
Watches and Eyeglasses
Watches and sunglasses are the most important accessory a man can own. If you have the possibility invest in watches or sunglasses, within time they get more value or invest in one that suits your lifestyle and taste, however, if you are someone who likes to own more than on, wear the appropriate timepiece for your outfit: black band with black shoes and belt; brown band with brown shoes and belt; and silver band for either.
Eyeglasses and Sunglasses are my addiction and, one of the few ways you can really express yourself. I have a collection of suglasses, I like to match and change the style, based on my mood and based on my oufit.
They don't have to just serve a function, but can enhance your overall look. Do your best to find a pair of glasses or sunglasses that not only compliments the shape of your face, but also express your personality. Ask someone and when you decide to buy a pair, as I always say take your time, and get good advice about what shape and style looks best for your face and features.
Terminology for handbags
Today I will list a selection of handbags that might be helpful to accentuate your body shape.
Here are some popular shapes:
The tote: An open-top bag with straps or handles.
The hobo bag: A crescent-shaped shoulder bag. This style is often soft and slouchy.
The duffle: A tall shoulder bag, often with a opening on top.
The field bag: A flap-top shoulder bag with utility-type closure (buckles,snaps,etc).
The clutch: A small, handheld bag or a larger, geometric shape that is tucked under the arm or carried in your hand.
The baguette: Long and rounded shoulder bag resembling the namesake bread (and made famous by Fendi).
If you still are confused when you are in a store Take your time to try on handbags in front of a mirror just like you would apparel.
Don't be tempted be trendy shapes that don't suit your figure.There are plenty of great alternatives that will work.
Think lifestyle when shopping for handbags. If you're toting diapers and graham crackers, an artsy vintage bag won't hold up.
How to choose the right bag.
Consider something for a moment. You probably don't give handbags the same scrutiny you give a pair of jeans or shoes, right?
If a handbag is chic or works with your lifestyle...Well, then it works!
But did you know that a handbag can flatter your shape almost as much as the right pair of jeans?
Apply these easy steps to find a bag that's in proportion to your figure.
It can not only knock off pounds visually (Not kidding with the right handbag you can drop few pounds without sweating), it'll also polish up your style in a flash.
If you are trying to play down a body type, choose a shape that is the opposite of your body silhouette, for example, if you are very tall and thin, you can add a slouchy, rounded hobo bag to add some curves to your figure. If you are short and curvy, play off opposites by choosing a handbag that is tall and rectangular or long and sleek...like a clutch.
In general, the rounder your figure, the more structured your bag should be. That doesn't mean that you have to carry a hard box around to counterbalance your womanly shape: rectangular or square silhouettes in soft leather or fabric will do the trick. For example, a petite, curvy figure..like....oh god...Kim Kardi or Adele would look great carrying a large rectangular clutch bag.
The next post will be all about the terminology for the handbags
Find your signature look
As we said before, trends come and go- but that doesn't mean you can't or shouldn't grab hold tightly of the ones that work best for you. Fashion fades and style is what is eternal. Focus on the cuts you love the most, what makes you fell and look your best even if it isn't trendy.
Your personal style is an extension of your personality so let it shine!
True style is really learning to take a look and make it all your own. whether you add a personal accessory - like something vintage or ethnic - or you wear a look that's all your own (maybe you like to mix '80s pieces with modern or you like to wear color-blocked everyday) finding your signature style is one of the most rewarding things about loving fashion.
Shape of you
This topic is the most controversial of all. In the past decades we were under attack by all those skinny bit**es out there, showing off their flat bellies, long lengs and fantastic hair and us...... HAIII!! I wish you could all see me now, while I am typing... I really dislike those skinny "beaches". I am one of those human creatures that, after a glass of water I have to fast for at least one week, and fasting with what?
"Ai dios mio!"..
But lucky us fashion is changing, there are more curvy models, no age limit and we are more often to see, not necessarily, the "perfect"stereotype model and these changes are helping people out there struggeling with their shape.
Whenever you are tall or curvy, petite, boy-ish or blessed with curves - dressing in a way that flatters your specific body will always make you feel more confident and beautiful.
Taller women can get away with longer hemlines, while more petite women will want to avoid being swallowed up by what they wear.
Hourglass figures should embrace figure-hugging dresses and so on but most important thing, use the right size.
It is a constant nowadays, I see people, women and men using clothes one or two size smaller, that is always something to avoid...I was about to say something shady but I won't...
Is your gown the right lenght? Has your jacket been tailored? does your sleeve hem hit you just right? Having a garment that fits is one of the best ways to perfect your look.
If you have any doubts and you have the possibility consult a stylist, or grab your BFF they won't lie to you...hopefully or, use a mirror.
Get to your mirror and play with your body, if you think that there is too much skin hanging and not in a flattering way, well... take it off and go for the next dress.
Use your colours
Yesterday I had the chance to watch the 60th Grammy awards, and let me tell you, I love a nice black dress, my previous post was about how you can make the best of it, but what I saw last night was way too much, long, short, marmaid cuts, so many options but the main colour was black.
I will post an article about it in the next days.
Today I will share my experience with you lovely people, and the topic is how to use our best color and the best shape for our body.
"Wear your best colours whenever you can!" I know that some of you don't really know which color suits you better, I learnt after years that yellow and reds are not my colours, I look like Edward Scissorhands and not in a good way so I avoid those colors as much as possible.
Gorgeous, rich and flattering colors like violet, blue and pink can all make your skin, hair and eyes look amazing.
Wear your best colors to really make your wardrobe pop.
If you are wondering which color is best for your skin tone, test yourself using a mirror, play with your clothes, fashion after all is fun, there are colors that makes your skin glow and some others that make you look like an episode of Wakling Dead.
Choose those colors and make them yours.
And keep in mind that fashion is fun and should be fun so...don't stress out take your time and make the best of your wardrobe.
How to glam up your LBD
How many times you heard these words...
"I have nothing to wear!"
There are few items more critical to a stylish woman's wardrobe than a little black dress, also known as the LBD.
In fact, we'd argue that having just one little black dress is probably not enough, in my humble opinion, black items in your wardrobe are never enough.
Having a small selection - so that you can dress up a little black dress make it casual- will lend even more versatility to your wardrobe.
The LBD is like...like a black canvas. You can accessorize, add details, switch it up your jewelry and layer it in unique ways, and there is no need to spend a fortune, we are lucky enough to live in a city where the options are various and, if you are unable to go out, but still you want to look 'gorge' you can always search the web and trust me, there are plenty of options.
Whether you own one LBD or 10, don't be afraid to get creative with your styling.
I pulled images from the red carpet and from my favourite fashion week street style stars to...inspire.
There is a good reason why the head-to-toe black is favoured by fashion insiders, editors,buyers and models: It's super chic!
In this pic, Elsa Pataky shows off how to wear head-to-toe black in a sophisticated, youthful way.
Her sleeveless mini dress has a slightly a-line skirt, but with the addition of a belt and some shimmering detail, her look is anything but basic.
To keep it sleek, she paired the dress with classic pointed-toe black pumps, which give her overall look timeless appeal, like a modern take on Holly Golightly.
Stranger things part.2
I am still in shock, on the platform, the little baby girl still laughing at me 'cause what I see is something that I have never seen before. There are a few rules in fashion, I mean, I love fashion because we all are free to do whatever we want, use our creativity, our own taste and sense of style, however there is something out there called decency.
Wearing a pair of flip-flops with or without socks in public, especially in winter time is already a mega fashion NO-NO! Lets be clear, not only for the eye but for the fact that it is winter for duck sake! and we are in London. This morning Bixby, waking me up told me that today the temperature would be around 4 degrees but -2°C real feel.
With this information beared in mind we all agree that wearing flip-flops, in winter time is not very recommended and socks is a NO-NO! and what the creature did this morning before left the nest? The creature decided to wear a pair of flip-flops with no socks.
"Pal, in the name of Coco Chanel, what were you thinking?"
Now you all understand why I still bend over looking down and holding Vanity Fair like if it is a powerful magic tool.
"Dude why you need to keep your calf muscles warm? You dont look like a ballet dancer!"
Now I understand that the majority of you will think that I might be too shady but come on!!
So shade aside my tip of today is:
if you are planning to be cool and you, somehow want to make your point of view heard...do it, but, and it is a big but, dont wear flip-flops with socks and most importantly, if you think your calf might be cold use something that some genius invented more than 3000 years ago...
Stranger Things Part.1
Wednesday, Jan 17th 2018
Well, this section of the website is all about me speaking my mind and hopefully put a smile on your lovely faces.
My fiance' the other day told me to keep the website more....serious I said that I will try to not swear, well not too much, and say things that can possibly offend someone, which is the least of my goals. You will understand and know me better if you follow me and follow my socials and if you read this section.
My goal, in this particular section of the website, is to have a laugh while I share my experience and give you some tips to enjoy more fashion not necessarily spending a capital.
The other day I was doing zapping on tv, and who doesn't or didn't watch and enjoyed this acclaimed Tv series, Stranger Things.
One of my best friend the other day, during a conversation, came to me with the 'victory' look saying
"HA...I watched last season of Stranger things last night....the whole thing, at once, and I am so excited..... you cannot believe!" Her eyes were shiny and sparkling, she was really proud about it.
"Come with me tomorrow at the tube station in the morning...." I said, I know that all of you are wondering what is the connection between Stranger things and the tube station?
Hold your horses people..let me explain.
I am not really into Aliens or creatures from other dimensions, if they ever exist, even though they exist, I am more afraid of the creatures that lives in this planet.
I like to do researches about things and stuff, and I often ask to my friend Wiki, the other day.... I know what you all are thinking...
"Really Jonathan?... you need to do a web search for that?"
I wanted to know the real meaning, the Wiki-pedia meaning, which I consider trustful, and you know what Wiki told me? that Aliens are
"Unfamiliar and disturbing or distasteful".
I like the word distasteful because I think it suits perfectly with what I am trying to share here today and trying to not be rude.....I'll try, promise, remember the filter that I mentioned earlier?
The whole point is, why on earth I have to be interested in 'aliens' from other dimensions when around me there are plenty, and the curious fact is, we can catch them!!!
Most of the time, and at their best, around 8am and who needs Area 51, I live in London zone 2!
I was walking to the station the other day and while I was enjoying music from my BFF Maddy, I see, behind my Chanel like if it was a fragment of a second, a tall green figure, the creature had a weird walk, like if the hips were disconnected from the body, I actually had a cold chill on the bottom of my neck, I, once again was soo confused!
The creature had a weird 'fluffy' pin at the upper part of what it seemed to be... the head, the creature slowly moves towards me and I am starting to sweat and today I am wearing Superdry how ironic is that?!
"Ok girl, calm down..." I am whispering to myself, the creature, that moments before was far and out of focus, now is clearly standing, in front of me, the creature is taller than me, a little drop of cold sweat crosses my forehead. I instantly reached my bag and without losing my sh*t behind my shades I started looking for the most powerful tool ever invented: Fashion magazines!
"Where is it?" I say to myself, I am looking for my Vanity Fair...
"I need all the help that I can get!" I find it and, like if it was a sort of magic object I point it at the creature
"Go away!!!" I say... Everyone and I mean everyone, even the cleaner of the station, there is a little dog....barking at me! everyone are staring at me and no one is helping...
I am literally holding, with both hands December's 2017 edition of Vanity Fair. I look around me and no one is helping me, they are staring at me instead.
I think to myself 'why isn't working? J.Lo is on the cover and she is from the bronx!'
I can see the green pattern moving from the corner of the magazine, and the creature is still there, a baby girl walks beside me, I look down and the little girl, objectively well educated, I state that because she is wearing a lovely little dress from Burberry , she is looking at me and for a moment she mocks me, pointing at me with her little finger, when I look up to the creature I couldn't believe at my eyes.......
To be continued...
Mondays..Ohh my days
Monday, Jan 15th 2018
As soon as I dated this post I realised how bad this Monday is.
I still have, printed in my mind the image of me, in front of the mirror holding the December issue of Vogue magazine on my left hand, the model on the cover is looking at me, I am pretty nervous.
"I promise..uhmmm Adwoa Aboah" I am struggeling with the name of the model...once again.
"I promise gurl.... I will stop eating junk food and... I promise I will start eating more fashion food!"
With the term fashion food I refer to all those dishes under 15 calories, I will make a list of all those dishes considered "fashion" in the next days, now...for all my Gurls out there, lift the finger from the screen of your cellphone or from the touchpad of the laptop or from the screen of your touchscreen tv (how fancy is that) or simply take off your hand from the mouse and raise it to the air if you love food as much as I do and.. ( you can breath now) like me made the promise, the promise of eating better on this particular day.
I like food, especially street food...street...garage...bathroom it doesn't matter as long there is food involved I don't mind the environment. Maybe is because of my Italian roots but I really like food and we all know that, fashion and food are like ...nemesis! Like me folding clothes...ain't happening. Joking I do fold clothes, only on special occasions like National Holidays.
Last year I was invited to a dinner event with buyers and Designers, the PR came towards me asking
"Why don't you indulge yourself with some food" she smiled at me and left, I was soo confused, because I don't do indulge, when I see food I don't even reach the letter D of Indulge in my mind that I already have pepperoni all over my beard.
So Monday means....back to routine before I step outside I check if everything is in the right place. Remember what happened the day before? I like to be presentable and decent when I am around the city and actually I consider myself a quite confident 30 (something) bearded man and when in those days you feel more confident I like to Giselle the street.
The Giselle that is in me is walking like there is no tomorrow, just to be clear I am more Gisella....than Giselle, she is a lovely farm girl that used to live beside my mothers house back in time and trust me when I say that her walk was feirce and confidence is everything nowadays, so I am Giselling the street with my earplugs waiting for the bus, when suddenldy I see this gorgeous girl, holding a cup of coffee I am checking her outfit, I always do that, she is wearing a vintage outfit, of course in my head I am screaming at her, the blazer is 2 sizes bigger than hers, the trousers are clearly not hers, or if they are she must being very overwweight in the past.
"Gurl I wish I had 20 minutes I could definetly help you out...for the hair gurl uhmmm sorry you need an appointment with a good one"
She is clearly having a rough moment...or loads of rough moments, she is clearly a homeless girl I think.
I continue to make comments in my head, nothing shady though, I really feel bad for her and I fell sorry to see a lovely girl like her not having...
"Hold on a sec!"
When I look down on her shoes...I am even more confused, I can see them, the little homeless girl is wearing a pair of immaculate
"Black Mary Jane by Chanel??!!! " Maybe she found them I think...and if she did she has great taste.
I check my pockets to see if I have any spare coin for her
"Ok.. 2 pounds, I feel very generous today"
I ring the bell of the bus and I see that she is getting ready to alight as well.
We get closer to my destination, the Revlon Head offices, I grab the coin from my pocket and I give it to her, she looks at me and she dosen't say a word
"OHH poor thing, she must be embaressed" I think to myself
"Do you need anything? like a nice hot tea?or something to eat?" I am trying to be polite with her, cause this gurl has taste..
"There is still hope for you" I almost whisper , she is still looking at me without saying a word, she puts her right hand inside the pocket of hers 3 size bigger trousers, and pulls out the latest model of a famous android smart phone, I am really confused, what should I do?
"Thanks for the help" she says holdin the 2 pounds coin in her hand
"But I am totally fine!" I am even more confused, I am really thinking of running before I do any more damage, who knows me well is aware that sometimes I have zero filters when it comes to speak out my mind, and as always I come out with one of my comments
"So what going on with your hair?" I am blushing so did she
"Excuse me?" she said
"Nice pair..Nice pair of shoes I mean"
Gisella transformed, in a blink of an eye in Micheal Bolt running for my life, like those women trying to catch the Black Friday deal.
The fashion tips on this awkward Monday are
I love a good vintage look but be very careful, it takes few seconds to transform from a nice and cool vintage look with a spare some change please look.
there is nothing wrong with wearing clothes that are few sizes bigger then ours the thing is...We need to learn how to style and most important feel comfortable with our clothes, because if we are not everyone else can see it.
- Pull the sleeves of the blazer up until you don't see the cuffs of the shirt, if you decide to wear a t-shirt underneath the blazer use accessories on your wrist.
- Use a thin belt on your waist, and make sure that the colour matches with the shoes if that is not always possible, use something else with the same colour, fashion is all about proportions, volumes and FUN!
-For some reasons (who am I to judge) you forget or don't have time to wash your hair, use some baby powder on the sculp, the powder absorbs the natural oil of your hair or....Gurl use a cap, a nice bandana or a nice Panama hat.
The secret in Fashion is everything needs to be smooth and always, and I mean it always a laugh cause when the fun stops....well it is Not fun anymore.
Sunglasses for life
Sunday, Jan 14th 2018
Sunday is the only day of the week that confuses me, or is the rest of the population that confuses me on this day, Sundays are made for stay at home, stay comfy in your fluffy, pinky extravaganza flip-flops maybe reading a fashion magazine, or watching something at the telly, and than suddenly it happenes
"Gurl...I told you to buy some milk yesterday! Now you know the deal!"
That is my inner voice reminding me the huge mistake I have made not doing the groceries the day before.
In my mind the only thing that bugs me is
"What I am going to wear? And....Why!" Yes, those are my only questions.
I made a research few months ago and I discovered that the 25.8% of UK citizens, on a Sunday, are more likely to be at home resting and recovering from the busy week.
I look at myself in the mirror before leaving my flat, and the only thing that I can notice is that, even though I am a 30 (something) years old bearded man, I look exactly like Rose from the Titanic, the old Rose though, not the sexy hot girl with the long red and shiny hair...nope, I am having issues on putting my scarf on, like she had issues on walking on the boat in the final scene...and it is Winter for Duck safe.
After two mantras and three "hommmms" I collect all my inner strenght and
I decide to step outside
"Gurl it is only the 25.8%..no one is going to notice you" or at least I am trying to convince myself.
After dealing with the homeless and trying to make a slalom between him and the "Pissing" man around the corner, I finally see the convenience store sign.
I am acting like I am in the F.B.I. witness programm
"I am safe..no one can recognise me"
Not because I am famous or something but, you know, I am a fashionista and if you are a fashionista like me you know exaclty what I am talking about. I don't even check the prize or the description of the label, I grab that bottle of milk, like if is the last bottle on the shelf and run for my life to the cashier, that is looking at me straight in the eye..
"Ok...this is awkward" I say to myself, he smiles at me and the only thing that I can think about is
"I just want to pay and go back to my warm nest"
"Oh good morning Mr. Cerruto....you have a little black thing in the corner of your right eye" the cashier says to me, I am really confused...
"How can he see my eyes if I am wearing as usual my sung...." It takes me two seconds to realise that I left my flat without washing my face and...I forgot my sunglasses.
The post of today is about... goals, inspiration, motive and drive... bulls*it, if you are a fashionista like me and you decide, because you are lazy or the end of the world is coming, to NOT wash your face at least for the love of Liza Minelli please wear a pair of sunglasses.
The future belongs to those
who believe in the beauty
of their dreams.